At the end of last year, I looked at my work and wondered. I wondered if I had grown. I wondered if I was better at the end of the year then I was at the start of the year. I wondered what I needed to change to grow "into something better".

Yes, I was feeling very reflective, and I paused to think about 2018. I have been playing with photography and creating for eight years now. I am no longer the newcomer, and yet I felt stale in my work. I had a moment when I held up the camera to my eye, and as I looked in the viewfinder, I could only see other Artist's work. My mind was not only flooded but drowning in a movie of images from Instagram and social media. I felt overwhelmed and I didn't know how to move forward other than lock in autopilot. I put the camera down and walked away.

I went to the beach, lots of beaches. I watched movies that inspired me. I finally finished reading the Outlander series; 9 big enormous books over 18 months of reading. I watched Downton Abbey, all six seasons. I cooked yummy and delicious food. I lit candles in the middle of the day and played music from my childhood.  I sat outside and watched the sunset.

I picked up my camera and captured our mess, my wild, my heart, and our moments. I captured moments that made me smile and gave me goosebumps. I let life unfold, and I found me again. I realised to grow "into something better" I need more than my camera. I need more than my creativity and my eye. I need all of my beautiful mess and to let my heart run wild.

Follow the circle to Celeste and see her beautiful mess and images this month.